It’s a bird, it’s a plane, its a Hitachi wand??
Never thought you’d see those words together, did you?
When I got the idea for the performance, I had imagined myself floating in an abyss with life-sized dildos, but I didn’t think I would be cooped up in my apartment covered in pink paint crafting a giant piece of cardboard into the Hitachi wand of my dreams.
Under my stage name Major Curl, I was cast to perform in Black Hole Burlesque’s “Love Sucks 5,” a show catering to all the post-Valentine’s Day lonely hearts, and thirsty eyes.
A 1950’s radio version of Splish Splash by Bobby Darin comes on, the piece starts with a scene of me in the bath, a nostalgic take on my first self-pleasure trip. In my fuzzy white robe, I blew bubbles into the crowd, hopping into the bath, I got to scrubbin’.
PHOTO CREDIT DRACO SEYE PHOTOGRAPHY
Naive 14-year-old me didn’t know the pain of a water brush burn, The audience watches my discomfort and dismay and I rocket out of the bathtub and lay eyes on……not a bird, not a plane, but a Hitachi wand?! Etta James “At last” rolls on, as I become doe-eyed, smitten with its big pink head, and shiny button. I find myself caressing the toy, taking up the entire length of my body, my Hitachi, and I embark on the partner dance of a lifetime.
PHOTO CREDIT DRACO SEYE PHOTOGRAPHY
With the show description reading “Love Sucks 5, We're back for the 5th year in a row to make you laugh, cry, and provide ALL the weird boners,” my interpretation of “Love Sucks” was one of the self-pleasure variety. Nothing screams post-v-day blues like a new sex toy.
PHOTO CREDIT DRACO SEYE PHOTOGRAPHY
A clip from the performance can be viewed at: @_major_curl
The full performance can be viewed on Patreon
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Major Curl (they/them) is a Philly-based drag performer